St. James Storytelling – June 2025

by Kathy Felix

*This article was written in December 2024. Kathy joined St. James in February 2025.

My journey to St. James started even before I realized I would be attending. My husband, John, became sick near the end of Feb. 2024, and ended up with a bacterial staph infection which attached itself to his mitral valve. He had to have an artificial value replacement. After a month in the hospital he was sent home to recover. He was on his way to healing, and the doctors felt he needed to return to work so they released him. He went back for a few weeks and just couldn’t work. He returned to the doctors, and they said he went back too early and directed him to take off work from July 3 – 23. The doctor said he would be healthy and strong by July 23. Unfortunately, he collapsed at our home on July 16, he never “came to,” and passed away on July 20th.

The day he passed away my granddaughter Jacilyn flew home from a St. James church trip. She came straight to the hospital to say her goodbyes. We talked on the way back home. I was telling Jacilyn how lost I was and wanted to know if John really went to heaven, so I would be able to see him again. A few weeks went by, and I felt myself settling into a dark place.

That is when I decided to go to one service at St. James because Jacilyn found a lot of help by attending the youth group. I looked at the St James website. I looked up information about the Lutheran religion, and decided I needed to do something to help myself. The church John and I had attended for years hadn’t reached out to me. I felt that it was not the right avenue to return there.

So, the morning of August 4th I got up and set out to attend 1 or 2 times. I wasn’t sure that is what I needed. All I knew is I needed to find out if John truly went to heaven, and if I was going to make it through all the grieving. I got to the church, parked my car and as I walked in, people were saying good morning. The greeter at the door was smiling. Then during the service sharing “peace be with you,” I can’t even remember how many people came up to me welcoming me even though they hadn’t met me there before. I was able to take communion and really enjoyed the service. When the service was over, several people came up to me and told me they hoped I returned, or “hope to see you next Sunday.”

The work week passed, and I was feeling like I wanted to go back. The 2nd week when I attended, people actually remembered it was my 2nd time. They said things like “glad you made it back.” A few people asked me where I lived and where I used to attend. I realized many people were raised Catholic, and then for a while went to a Methodist church. Then they found a good fit at St. James. After my 2nd time attending, I thought St. James may be a good fit for me too. I continued to go and one Sunday I asked Cathy, a lady at church that made sure to greet me each Sunday, about Sunday school. I now go to the same class she attends, and Lucinda leads it, and she is awesome. I also met Emily and then afterwards saw her at the grocery store. She was wonderful and we exchanged cell numbers.

Once I realized I felt so comfortable there, I signed up to be part of the dinner group. This was outside my comfort zone, going to a stranger’s house with everyone else being a couple. I was afraid of being a 3rd wheel. Everyone in our group has been very welcoming and I didn’t feel like a 3rd wheel. Diane and Doug, that hosted the first dinner party, were terrific. After the dinner Diane and I talked. Now we sit together at church. This gave me a little confidence, so I signed up to serve as a greeter and an usher. Things were going great, as everyone was friendly, helpful and made me feel at home.

I realized while this was helping me with my grief, I still didn’t know for sure if John went to heaven. I felt like he must have but still wasn’t 100% sure. So, after service I went home and completed the application to be a member. I knew I would have to talk one on one with Pr. Andrew. Our conversation was the best talk I have had since John’s passing. Pr. Andrew let me talk and talk. Pr. Andrew looked right at me after I talked for over 45 minutes, and told me there is no doubt at all that John is in heaven. Attending the services for a couple months and listening to Pr. Andrew, Pr. Libby and then having the meeting with Pr. Andrew helped me realize that John is in heaven, and I will see him again.

Though I am not a member yet, as I am waiting for the next new member class, I began signing up for every activity I could. I donated bikes for kids that need them. I went to the apple picking, and church picnic where I met so many more people. Santa Breakfast was so much fun. At every event, I was getting to know more and more people.

I took a chance and wrote a piece for the Advent Devotional. Sharing my personal feelings has never been my strong suit. This really helped me, and Pr. Libby gave me encouragement through the entire process. Since then, I felt more and more like I could share at church, and I had met a group of people that really cared about me. I feel like I have a second family, my church family. Going to the weekly dinners on Wednesdays, and the services after, has been great. My church family just keeps growing.

I am so thankful for everyone here at St. James. I feel like I am already a member of the St. James family and being an “actual member” is only a formality.